I’ll be the first to admit from personal experience that people can be cruel and unkind. They might say or do mean things to take you down and sometimes we may not understand why we’re the target. It seems that kind people get the short end of the stick and get burnt the most. But these same people haven’t allowed these people to change them.
People are only mean when they are threatened, and when you are threatened, you begin looking out for yourself, without any regard towards peoples feelings. It is only then we say things out of anger and spite, in a desperate attempt to take someone else down. But what we fail to realise is when they hurt someone else, it is a reflection of themselves and something they are insecure about.
We as people have a common trait of blaming others for our problems. We think if it’s someone else’s fault, it takes it off of our shoulders. But at the end of the day, all we have is ourselves. It is our jobs to live with the people we are, without needing to take others down in the process. Sadly, people build themselves up in the process of destroying another. They will take your insecurities and knock you so hard you don’t know what hit you.
Sometimes these people are strangers or acquaintances, but the hardest instances are when these people are friends. When someone is your friend and they hurt you, they have a leg up above others because they know how to get to you. They know what to say to hurt you if they choose.
When a friend goes out of their way to hurt you, walk away. When someone deliberately sets a fire in your life, run from it. Do not add fuel to the fire for it will only get worse and make situations worse.
So how do we forgive someone who has burnt us? How do we accept this has occurred? And how do we move on with our lives bearing the scars that have prevailed in the process?
It begins with forgiving yourself for allowing them to hurt you. People only have power over you if you let them. If you are crying your eyes out as a result of something they have done, you are letting them get to you. You are letting them win. We must forgive ourselves. It is only when we accept that we are part of the problem as well as the solution that we can move on.
Make the necessary changes, because if you don’t change your ways people will keep burning you in life. I’m not saying turn cold hearted and unkind, but stop allowing people to hurt you. Most of all, don’t allow yourself to get angry.
If you allow anger to take over, it is only then that you lose control. Anger is an emotion that masks pain and it is your job to first feel pain. No one wants to feel pain. It is easier to be angry with someone than it is to accept the fact that they have hurt you. But it is only through feeling pain entirely that we can get over a situation. If we hold onto anger we will never get over a situation. Let go of anger.
Understand that if someone doesn’t apologise it doesn’t mean you can’t get over it. Sometimes closure comes from within, bearing no apology at all. Accept that. Accept that people are going to be mean and cruel but it shouldn’t be an excuse for you to continue the cycle of unkindness.
If you are a good person and you are trying your best in every situation, that’s all you can do. Do not let one person who has hurt you mean more than those people who haven’t… those people who love you and accept you for all you are. Just because one person tries to take you down, doesn’t mean they are right.
Stand back up and don’t fight. Just walk away from a negative situation.
We may never get the apologies we think we deserve. We may never leave someone’s life on a good note. All we can do in life is our best.
