The Kid Conundrum: I Don’t Want Kids!

by Kayla Lupoli-Nolan

While there are some that already have their baby names and cribs picked out, there are some of us who aren’t ready for kids. Now or ever. Yes, this small minority does exist.

I’m 21, still in college, have no clue about the future and plan on never having kids. Ever.

Unpopular opinion

My unpopular opinion is shared by only a few friends that can be counted on one hand. Usually when I tell people that I don’t plan on following the norm, I’m greeted with, “Oh, don’t say that,” or “Kids are so cute! How could you not want them?” or “You’ll end up having, like, seven kids.” No, no, no, no, no. That maternal instinct is not always an overpowering feeling that determines your future life choices. I have an entire life ahead of me that doesn’t include children. These things include, but are not limited to traveling the world, being the cool wine aunt, and taking over the world. Is that selfish? Maybe. Do I care? Not particularly.

Break the stigma

Giving birth may be a biological process but that does not mean that it is an inevitable one that every woman will eventually end up following. 

Like I said before, my unpopular opinion is only shared by a few friends but it is a shared opinion. There are tons of people, male and female alike, that have this opinion but keep it to themselves. There seems to be a stigma surrounding this that scares people into thinking differently or to keeping quiet. This stigma is that you either hate children, the thought of marriage, or good ol’ Christian values. Sure, some of this can be true and that’s okay. What most people realise is that there are a multitude of reasons why people don’t want to have kids. For me, carrying something in my body for nine months of the year kind of freaks me out. A lot. I would feel like Dana Scully carrying an alien around in my body. Maybe I just don’t like kids, which is only true in some situations. I can’t really deal with kids in public places or when they come into my job and they’re screaming and crying.

Don’t get it twisted, I love my cousins who are under 12 years-old. But it’s just hard for me to deal with kids sometimes. Or maybe there’s a medical reason. Ovarian cancer is a killer that people don’t realise. Some stages can force a woman to choose whether or not she would want to freeze her eggs so she can have kids at a later time in life. Not every women is going to do that. There are some who decide against having kids for that reason alone.

It’s 2016, have your opinions and respect others’

I’m one of the lucky ones who don’t feel shame in having this opinion.  But remember if you do have this opinion and you are ashamed to tell anyone, that’s 100% okay too. And if you don’t agree with this opinion, don’t shame those who do! It’s 2016 and people should be allowed to have different life views. Granted this happens all of the time and there’s no way to stop that. Some advice I would give to those people would be this: just don’t be an ass.

I’m still trying to figure out how to get through life and it’s totally possible that my opinion might change in a year from now or even 13 years from now.  

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