Ah Christmas. The most wonderful time of the year, right?
To be sure, it is a season like no other. It evokes strong memories, nostalgic cliches and stimulates all the senses. That feeling of being cozied up in copious layers as you brace the winter chill. It’s a cherished time of hot drinks and cold feet. The smell of mulled wine and roasted chestnuts. The taste of chocolates and brandy for breakfast (hey, its Christmas). It’s the welcome sight of glittered lights embellishing our everyday streets, making you contemplate your surroundings in an entirely new way.
Oh and yes, lest us forget, the symbolic sounds of Christmas; the illusive jingle of bells in the distance, the sound of joyful children as they frolick in the snow, and the soothing notes of the carol singers on the street.
No, sorry, the B-side to our christmas soundtrack is the sound of desperate singletons sobbing over the fact that Christmas has come again, and they are single, lonely and they’ve just received “Vegan cooking for one” and numerous self help books in their stocking… Just me? Awkward.
To speak candidly, as well as being the most wonderful time of the year, it is also the most stressful. I’m not even talking about present giving. It’s the time of year where being ‘single’ is inconvenient for all parties involved. On a personal level, it means family time where I will be bombarded with intrusive questions about my seemingly inevitable path to spinsterhood over a hearty Christmas meal. This brings a whole new meaning to the already formidable phrase “Winter Is Coming”.
Christmas – The Alternate Valentines:
Although there are some charming activities to get involved, the allure of winter activities is tarnished by the number of those that involve couples. While the third wheel is never ideal, it is an even more formidable circumstance at Christmas. Couples skating on ice rinks, the hunt for your perfect Instagram holiday photo of you looking blissfully frozen at the Christmas market, picking out a tree, couple cards, shopping and anything else that occurs in a Richard Curtis movie. Your cuddle companion is your trusty water bottle. Although it’s totally cool to grab a friend and adventure together, when they are in a relationship Christmas becomes an alternate Valentines Day. Because, above all it is a time of coming together and celebrating loved ones.
Even something as simple as shopping feels more romantic under the influence of Christmas. The fairy lights illuminate our everyday street with an intimate glow reminiscent of a candlelit dinner.
Even the movies make us cry for love.
This is reinforced in the movies we watch. It’s the time of year when Rom-Coms thrive and we indulge in our social and universal obsession with love and our ongoing quest for companionship. A rather sufficient amount of romantic comedies have been centred on this festive season. Just some of my favourites include “Love Actually”, “Bridget Jones”, “The Holiday”, “While You Were Sleeping”, “Serendipity” – so many movies wherein Christmas is another landmark in the whirlwind of courtship. “Even Die Hard” (my most beloved christmas movies, and yes, it IS a christmas movie) has a romantic reconcillation at the end.
Why do all these people find love at Christmas? Is it the snow, the lights, the increased alcohol consumption or merely just the desperation not to be a christmas calamity? In the Holiday, Cameron Diaz and Kate Winslet flee across the Atlantic ocean in attempt to rid themselves of their romantic woes and forget their singleton status at Christmas. I feel many of us singletons would much prefer to relax to videos from websites similar www.teentuber.xxx then think about our romantic woes.
Mistletoe – The Lip Lock of Uncertainty
The tradition of mistletoe – created for singltons in order for them to find another lonely soul this time of year. The only time we have a tradition encouraging us to make-out with a total stranger.
That being said, there is an altertative view. Although tempting, there’s no need to be a Grinch just yet. Society tells us that spending Christmas alone is a pitiful tragedy and people feel sorry for you. Well stop being one of those people. Don’t apologise and don’t despise your singleton status – there are some perks to being unattached this time of year.
Making time and keeping friends: Time for loved ones, a time of for family. Don’t sulk about not having a man when you could be spending this time with your family and friends. We get certain time off and work is more forgiving, so see people you usually don’t have time to see. Playing board games with the brothers can be entertaining. Try to ignore the family interrogations and enjoy yourself – forget the dreaded question “have you met anyone?” Tell them about the other things you’ve been up to, like that time you saved a puppy, instead.
Opportunities: Grab them by their Christmas baubles. There are so many events going on. No relationship, no commitment. Say yes to it all. Put on your favourite pair of heels, festive lipstick and dance the night away.
Save, Save, Save: Although Christmas is not about the money, its about the thought – that old chestnut, your bank account does take a battering regardless of this. Instead of spending money on your significant other, save up for that holiday you’ve always wanted to take in the new year. Treat yourself a little more over the holidays. that X-Box money can be spent on shoes. If being single means extra shoes, this is an important sacrifice I am willing to make.
Avoid present politics: You do not have the whole “what the hell do I buy them” scenario. You want something representative of how you feel but don’t want to get it wrong. Queue arguments and bickering over you not truly understanding your partner. You might start to question your entire relationship because you got him the wrong colour jumper… who needs the hassle.
Alone time: I know that might not be what your looking for right now. Another lonely night with the voices in your head for company doesn’t sound appealing but sometimes this is a great thing. Time alone means a junk-food-movie-night in your most comfortable pair of sweats; Gilmore style. Around this time, the TV usually has some awesome movies scheduled, so just chill and drink wine.
Spontaneous nights: Long and drunken nights, no one to come home to? No worries. Don’t go home. Stay out as long as you want fearless about the morning consequences.
New Year – A New Start: Whether this means finding someone special for next Christmas or simply just spending more time alone. Christmas can be a great time to stop and think about what is important to you. Then in the New Year, you can go and get it.
No Christmas Day Conundrum: No awkward moment when you have to decide whose parents to go round. No arguments about whose mum’s Christmas dinner is best. This can be a make or break situation, I’m glad to avoid it.
Meeting New People: Yet if you can’t embrace the single scene at Christmas, know this: It is also the best time of year to meet someone. (Or is this just the movies seducing us with beautiful lies?) You never know who you will find under the mistletoe.
